A couple of weeks ago I had a very clear memory of Carlita. It was as if I had just seen her; the feeling of her was crisp and bold. I wish it could be like that every day. But I think part of the healing from the grief of losing her is that most of the time the memory of her is fuzzy and soft in my mind.
A couple of people asked me if I was going to write anything today - this anniversary of Carlita's death - in this deserted blog. It was good to come here and remember her and remember some of what I have come through. God is faithful. I haven't cried over Car for months...until today. But God has brought me a lot of healing over the last two years. I am thankful for that. Today is a difficult day, but the pain has been eased a great deal.
There is nobody like Carlita. No one can take her place in my life. She was unique and a delight. She was stronger than she thought she was. She was an encouragement to me.
Thanks God for sharing her with us for a while.
1 comment:
Larissa,
I don't know if you will even get this, but I feel the need to reach out. I am Ellen Berg (now Batchelor) and also a friend of Carlita's. I don't know if you remember me. I got married around the time Carlita got sick and since then have lost 12 relatives (including my mom and dad).
I just learned that my favorite aunt died today and I'm in the mode of remembering those who have gone before. I was trying to remember the actual date of Carlita's death (since there have been so many deaths the dates are blurry) and was searching online and your blog was the only reference I could find to so special a life.
Are you still friends with Aaron and family? I have tried so hard to stay in touch from Colorado. It seems the family has shut down/fallen apart. I don't feel like they welcome me in their lives any more so now I only pray and from time to time send a card. I wonder where there hearts are in connection with God. I wonder what Carlita would think of how things have turned out (so far).
Anyway, I just wanted to connect with someone who loved Carlita as much as I did (maybe more!) and has missed her too. Your memories and comments were my own. I don't understand why Carlita had to die when she did. I still don't. And I do still miss her.
I hope you have been able to hold on to your faith in your own journey of healing.
Ellen
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